Lalezar Orinbaeva - For parental love
Moderator 
Lalezar Orinbaeva
LIFE - A CLUSTER OF EMOTIONS
If one were to reflect on life from beginning to end, analyzing every moment, one would realize that life is a cluster-an intricate web of interconnected experiences. Our arrival into this world, the joy of our parents, our first steps, our first words, our innocent childhood laughter, our boundless love and affection-all these are paralleled by our first fall, the first pain we ever felt, the first scolding we received, the first time we were deceived, the first sorrows that touched our hearts.
Indeed, every person carries their own burdens. Some accept and learn to live with their pain, while others struggle to come to terms with it. These sorrows take different forms in different people’s lives—some are rooted in childhood, others in adolescence, and for some, they emerge in adulthood, leaving permanent scars.
For me, the greatest sorrow is tied to the loss of my parents. There is a saying in our culture: "The death of parents is an inheritance." And yet, despite this truth, I still cannot accept it.
Throughout my life, I have encountered all sorts of experiences-lies, betrayals, gratitude, kindness, and cruelty. Some of these moments remain deeply embedded in my heart, refusing to fade away, because they came from people and in situations where I least expected them.
But the pain of losing my parents is the deepest, the one for which I have never found healing, the one I can never come to terms with. The fact that they are no longer in this world, that I can no longer see them whenever I wish, seek their blessings, ask for their advice when I need it most, or simply bask in their presence-this is a pain that time has not eased. I can no longer rest my head on my mother’s lap and fall asleep, just as I did in my childhood, nor can I run my fingers through her silver-streaked hair and tell her, "Forgive me, Mother, our worries have aged you."
This pain is one that eats away at a person from the inside, bringing forth tears involuntarily, forcing deep sighs, and leaving an unfillable void in the soul. I still cannot accept the absence of my mother’s warm, healing words:
"Have you come, my child? You’re late again… Are you okay? How is your health? Are you struggling? What do you need?"
Nor can I accept that I will never again hear my father’s tender voice:
"My daughter, my precious one… This is my daughter-do not hurt her, do not make her cry! Are you eating well? Don’t leave home on an empty stomach. Here, take this money—don’t worry, I’ll give it to you. What do you want, my child?"
These words, so sweet and full of love, are now lost to time. No matter how much wealth I may amass, no matter how many years I may live, no power in this world can bring back those stolen moments.
Life passes in the blink of an eye. We keep telling ourselves, "I will do this tomorrow… I will visit them later…" but we fail to realize that time is slipping away. And then, one day, we find ourselves standing alone, separated from the greatest treasures we once had-the ones who could heal all wounds, the ones who would listen to our sorrows without complaint, the ones who sacrificed everything for our happiness.
This pain does not fade with age. It creates a void so deep that no wealth, no kind words, no gifts, and no gestures of affection from those around us can ever fill it.
Yes, I am that woman-one who has lost her parents, and one who, no matter how much time passes, still cannot accept this sorrow.
My dear ones, if your parents are still with you, cherish them, treasure them, and hold them close. Be their comfort in times of pain, be ever ready to serve them, and love them unconditionally.
Time is merciless-it slips through our fingers before we even realize it. One day, no matter how much you sacrifice, no matter how much wealth you scatter across the world, you will not be able to bring them back. And then, just like me, you will be left with an unbearable sorrow, one you can never come to terms with.
So do not wait. Love them today. Honor them today. Because when they are gone, no wealth, no power, and no regret will ever be enough to fill the void they leave behind.
BIO:
Lalezar Orinbaeva was born in 2003 in the Turtkul district of the Republic of Karakalpakstan. She is of Turkmen nationality. In 2021, she became a student at the Faculty of Primary Education at the Tashkent University of Applied Sciences in Tashkent. She is an ambassador for three international organizations and a member of one international organization. Her creative works have been published in Kenya, Germany, Albania, Azerbaijan, Russia, Belarus, and several other foreign countries, and are indexed on Google. She is the recipient of various international certificates. She has also founded her personal "Anthology". Lalezar is a holder of international medals, statuettes, diplomas, certificates, and invitations. She is a professional curator.
